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Our culture changes from decade to decade. There was a time that overweight people were thought to be the most beautiful. Then, it transformed into the really thin people being the ideal size. One minute, it is better to have no butt and the next it is better to have Beyoncé’s butt.
Society’s expectations on how our bodies should look will always change. These unrealistic expectations are the cause of many girls taking drastic measures to change their bodies. They have been known to starve themselves, purge themselves and hate themselves – all because society says we should look a certain way.
When I was growing up, I was picked on relentlessly because my butt wasn’t bountiful. I was called all kind of names and was made to feel like I wasn’t as good as girls who had ghetto booties. Then, my boobs came in way too much. It was like God misplaced some of the bootie just to give me bigger boobs.
I was talking a while back with a couple of black girl friends of mine and sharing my little bootie despair with them. After they laughed with me for a few minutes, they shared that they too have to deal with cultural oppression. They say that they have been criticized because they didn’t wear their hair in a “white girl way”. They kept their African-American style and some of their family members gave them grief over it.
So, white girls want ghetto booties and black girls want white girls’ hair —- so society dictates.
How many times have I dreamed that J’Lo and I could just exchange butts!
But, it isn’t my fate. I have had to learn how to be okay with the way my body is shaped. I have no pronounced hips and seem to be a straight shot all the way up – not counting the boobs and stomach. Even when I was 135lbs of pure muscle, I wasn’t shapely. Truth be told, I have what I call a runner’s body. Instead of fighting this, I am going to go with it.
This is one of the main reasons why I have focused on running. I will take what God has given me and make it the best I can. Of course, I have also studied weight lifting techniques to build muscle mass in the glutes and thighs. I figure I will make them as big as physically possible through power lifting and then use running to align my body to its natural state.
So, what is your body shape? Where do you carry the extra weight?
Some women carry it in their butts and hips – aren’t you lucky? That is in style right this minute so you can still be extremely attractive according to society while losing weight. You have less chance of having medical problems from your weight. They call this the pear shape. When establishing your weight loss plan and work out plan, accept that fact that you will always have hips. You could balance your body by doing lower body aerobics with upper body mini-power lifting. If you don’t want your thighs and hips to be any bigger, don’t power lift heavy weights when you do your lunges and such. Do light weights with many reps.
Women like me carry it in their stomachs and our bodies look like apples. This is the dangerous weight gain because of visceral fat that could lead to heart disease. Our daily eating habits need to include a severe reduction in simple sugar based foods and drinks with a proper balance of protein and carbs. Balancing the proteins and complex carbs help regulate blood sugar in the body and will help burn stomach fat better. This is what I am doing and have already lost almost 5 inches in stomach fat in just over 2 months. We apples will probably never have the shapely, seductive bodies – but we can be our ideal weight, powerful and gorgeous in our own rights. We need to claim it and work with it. This is why I am aiming for the runner’s body because it will look awesome on me.
Bottom line to this article is — DON’T GET CAUGHT UP IN WHAT SOCIETY THINKS!!!!
Understand you won’t necessarily get your body to look like your favorite actress and that’s okay. You are beautiful the way God made you. It is just time to tone up, eat whole healthy foods and build muscle where needed to have a balanced shaped body.
Society will change its mind again soon anyway and then your body type may then be preferred by the masses.
We need weight loss anchors that will keep us on the straight path we have set for ourselves.
A ship coming in from the sea requires to be anchored in secure locations. Without an anchor, the ship cannot stand true. It would be lost at sea, never to find its way home.
We, too, need anchors in our lives. Anchors can be found in every section of our lives. We find religious anchors in the deities we worship. I know that every decision I make always ends with an evaluation of “Am I keeping my eyes on Jesus Christ as I make this decision?” He is my life anchor.
We need weight loss anchors that will keep us on the straight path we have set for ourselves. An anchor is simply a time in our life or someone else’s that represents what we are capable of achieving. Every person is different and we all face a variety of circumstances that shape our realities.
We need to identify a time in our life that we were living with the ideal weight and anchor to those experiences. For those who do not have a personal experience of ideal weight, it gets a little trickier. You have to really use your imagination and identify a scenario in which you can imagine yourself at your ideal weight over and over again.
The best way I can explain this is with my story. I was raised as a couch potato gorging on junk food. I was terrible at sports and was always picked last. I hated PE time in school because it shown a light on how physically pathetic I was. The only spotlight in PE was the weight lifting room because I could at least hold my own – no special talents needed to perform. Obviously, I will not use my youth experiences as an anchor to latch on to other than the satisfaction that I felt in the weight room. I still prefer lifting weights today over aerobics or sports.
My next phase of life included a three year stint in the military right after high school. I was so out of shape that I couldn’t even do one pushup when I first went to basic training. Luckily there was some general somewhere that had faith in people like me because he had previously set up a special company to physically train couch potatoes and mama’s boys.
It was simply called Fitness Company and I was assigned to this unit where my primary duties were to enter “Lucifer’s Pit” training chambers daily and do about 8 hrs of physical training. Steam engines and wall pushups became my best friends. We were worked so hard, even grown men had tears in their eyes. Of course, women have a higher thresh hold of pain tolerance so we didn’t cry as long as the men did.
I spent about a month in this company before moving on to 8 weeks of basic training. When my training was over, I knew my crap didn’t stink and I was “billy-bad-butt”. I felt so empowered. I had done things that I never thought I could do – like Victory Tower. I was 5’8” and weighed only 135lbs of pure muscle.
Of course, I hated PT (physical training) so I had not developed lifelong habits from this. I hadn’t really changed my mindset deeply enough to make this change permanent. When my three years were up, the weight began piling back on until 5 babies later I weight 235lbs and not very much of it was muscle.
Finally, my heart’s passion led me to become a health coach where I found my core “why” to find my ideal weight and keep it. Using the practices I use to help other women, I fixed my mindset and developed a strategy to use my core “why” to my benefit in losing weight.
One of the things I had to do was find my weight loss anchor. This was easier for me than it might be for some women because of my military experience and results. My job was now to recall and tangibly experience as many positive things as I could from my military days. I went through storage and pulled out my dress uniform. It is hanging on my office wall right now – I see it everytime I look up from the computer screen. It is sized to fit the old me of 135lbs. I see my war badge sewed on the left sleeve that reminds me that I survived war – this gives me courage and strength.
After enduring 30 days in “Lucifer’s Pit” I have thoroughly memorized all the exercise movements that I once did to become 135lbs. I now use those same exercises when I work out. When I run, I call cadence to myself. When I look in the mirror, I see myself standing thin and strong in my uniform.
I have taken it a step further. I am becoming a runner. This is strange because I have always hated running and would be one of the first to fall out of formation back in the day. However, my body’s shape is perfect for developing a runner’s body. Running gives my body the type of aerobics needed to keep the weight off while anchoring to my weight loss success in the military. I am using this running training to prepare to run 5ks, half-marathons and full marathons with the goal of raising money for our wounded and homeless veterans.
My military experience is my weight loss anchor. I have tied my physical training to a past point in my life that was empowering while fulfilling my desire to serve others. This weight loss anchor has given me motivation beyond anything I ever thought I could drum up. It empowers me, focuses me, and fuels me. I don’t know how long it will take me to ever run a marathon and more than likely I will be one of the last ones to complete it. However, that isn’t the point. I will be running for those who may not be able to run for themselves and sacrificed so that our country might be free. I will be running for my pride of serving in the military and serving my country which I love with all my heart. My increased health and weight loss will only be a side benefit of a greater purpose.
I don’t know exactly how you will find your anchor. Each of you reading this is so different from the next. You have your own voice – your own story. I would love to help you find your anchor. We can work together when you sign up for a free “ForeverThin” session at www.ForeverThin.me.